Here we go again. It's November, Adoption Awareness Month, time to be deluged by the message that adoption is the be-all and end-all of our modern civilization. A few years ago Origins-USA came up with a countermessage, Adoption BEwareness Month. In that spirit, my November blogs will be about the gotchas of adoption, the things people don't want to talk about.
We got off to a good (if it can be called "good") start at the end of October, with our discussion of adult adoptee Chynna and her experience being denied a Florida driver's license. This sort of humiliation is an everyday experience for many adoptees. You won't find out about that in the Adoption Awareness media blitz we'll all be enduring this month.
You also won't find out about SMAAC, a group of righteously pissed-off mothers shining daylight on the atrocities of the Baby Scoop Era. These atrocities continue today, something else not in the Adoption Awareness catalog.
Personally I am damn tired of hearing other peoples' opinions about adoption, people who often have no experience with it except through hearsay and TV movies. As an adoptee, I live adoption every day, and it's not the Disneyland ride people think it is. So I'm going to say something the Adoption Awareness folks don't want you to hear.
I hate adoption.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I hate adoption. I hate the lies. I hate the secrets. I hate that adoption has become about finding children for parents who want them instead of homes for children in need. I hate that people don't really understand how much adoption stinks. I hate the fact that adoption will probably always be necessary to some extent. I HATE our ridiculously aberrant closed-records system. I hate that I feel powerless to change much of the above, and that today, right now, another kid is turning into an adoptee and another mother is drowning in grief.
What bothers you about adoption? What secrets do you feel need to be brought to the surface? Post your experiences, and I'll be blogging about mine. Let's not allow Adoption BEwareness Month to pass by without shouting into its maelstrom.